Thursday, September 5, 2013

Another update and more to come

I haven't posted in a while but am back at working on my documentation for the dedicant path. I have had many things happen since my husbands passing in 2012. I've moved a half a dozen times, was homeless once but am once again where I can focus on my own healing and progressing to independence.

Blessings one and all

Phoenix

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Catching up ....finally

Many things have happened since my last post here.

My husband passed into the summerlands on June 20th, 2012 at 5:10 am
I moved ... and moved again
Lost practically everything I owned
Spent time homeless

....

On November 27th, 2012 I found my HOME.

I moved to Missouri and found where I belong.

I am playing catch up and getting myself organized.

AND back on track.

I hope to post weekly blogs on various topics as well as my progress through the DP.

Blessings one and all,

Phoenix FireStar Rising

Thursday, January 12, 2012

New Beginnings (Post 1)

I suppose the place to begin is the beginning. All beginnings start with a single step. This is the beginning of my journey and that step.

Virtue: According to Dictionary.com (This is the one covered in this blog)
1. moral excellence; goodness; righteousness.
2. conformity of one's life and conduct to moral and ethical principles; uprightness; rectitude.
3.  a good or admirable quality or property.

Piety:  According to Dictionary.com 
1.  reverence for God or devout fulfillment of religious obligations.
2.  dutiful respect or regard for parents, homeland, etc.

Study:  According to Dictionary.com 
1. application of the mind to the acquisition of knowledge, as by reading, investigation, or reflection.
2.  the cultivation of a particular branch of learning, science, or art.
3. a personal effort to gain knowledge.

I decided to start here rather than with the virtues (Wisdom, Piety, Vision, Courage, Integrity, Perseverance, Hospitality, Moderation and Fertility) because I think a good base is what counts so this is my attempt to build that base and give myself a jumping off point.

Virtue, for me, is how I act towards myself, my family, others, especially those on the outside so that they see me for who I am fully and not by someone else. I have always tried to be myself, tried to treat others as I have wanted to be treated. It doesn't always happen though. 

Virtue is like the Wiccan Rede,  "An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will". However, over time my view of this has also changed. I feel that anything you do, right or wrong, affects others and sometimes even right actions affect others negatively. I have learned, through my own faulted thinking that even right actions can hurt others.  

Virtue is slightly different than the rede in that it's not so much a rule or law but a way of life. To live true to yourself and yourself only, but to do the best you can. Accept that you can't please everyone all the time but as long as you live true to yourself, that's what matters.

As I think of more things to say on this topic I will add them. All comments or thoughts are welcome.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Busy week ..... sorry for not posting more

This week has been one of those weeks where time seems to speed up to a crazy pace.
Monday - Appointments with my husband all day (disability)
Tuesday (today) and Wednesday - Getting ready for classes to start (taking courses towards my bachelors in Emergency Management)  (all online) ... fighting with Financial Aid etc LOL ....
Thursday - Appointments with my husband all day (doctors)
Friday ... who knows .... this might be my rest up day and use the weekend to get caught back up and start all over again.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Jan 1 - Jan 3, 2012 - A time of contemplation

I've spent the last three days in thought about many things. About where I was in my life, in my path and in my family. I have decided that as of January 1st I was starting a clean slate. There was no need to dwell on the past - the good or the bad.

Starting today I will spend time daily studying, meditating in front of my altar. I know there is much I need to learn about this new path I am embarking on but I also know that the Gods are with me in whatever form they choose to appear to me in.

I will do my best to write in my blog daily about what I think, feel and see in the world around me. Sometimes what I will write about will be about family, friends, etc but I want this blog to be about the person I am growing into ... not the person from my past that I had become.

Many things happened in the last three months of 2011 to shape me into someone I wasn't sure I wanted to be. My husbands bout with cancer, which isn't over yet. But it is something that we will live with and work through to completion ... whatever that may be.

Some people don't understand my need to walk away from plans that had been made for things during those three months. Some walked away, I am still not sure why, but hope that they find peace in their reasons. I know I am at peace and did the right thing by putting my husband first.

I thank the Gods for those people who have helped us since the beginning, those who have not decided they needed to change their relationship with us and have only gotten closer. Many of those who are helping and have helped are Christian (Quaker).

Their philosophy (at least this churches) is if you see a brother or sister in need ... you help. You don't expect anything in return. You jump in with both feet and help them get through whatever has been handed them in life. This same church has helped me (personally) in the past when I first moved and had absolutely nothing.
They are a people to learn from.

Enough rambling. I will close with a poem I wrote many years ago during a sweatlodge - a poem given to me by the Mother (Earth). I hope you too will find blessings in the words.

In the Arms of the Mother

The Inipi was silent and the ground cool as the women entered.
The darkness wrapped around us like a mothers arms as the door was closed.

In the arms of the Mother we lay,
In the darkness of the womb,
The silence of the Inipi stirred my soul.

Round one brought questions,
Questions which I knew would be answered within.
The light in the darkness eased my uncertainty.

In the arms of the Mother we lay,
In the darkness of the womb,
The silence of the Inipi stirred my soul.

Round two brought an inner peace.
Prayers began forming in my mind.
The Ancestors held me safe and secure.

In the arms of the Mother we lay,
In the darkness of the womb,
The silence of the Inipi stirred my soul.

Round three brought the answers;
Questions which I had asked silently now complete.
My path now opened for me to take.

In the arms of the Mother we lay,
In the darkness of the womb,
The silence of the Inipi stirred my soul.

Round four brought completion.
I knew the path now, the plan formed within.
The answers I had been seeking finally shown in full light.

In the arms of the Mother we lay,
In the darkness of the womb,
The silence of the Inipi stirred my soul.

The door opened and the transformed slipped from within.
The womb of our mother had held us safe and secure.
The seeker no longer was seeking.

The hearts of all beat as one in joy and peace.

In the arms of the Mother we lay,
In the darkness of the womb,
The silence of the Inipi stirred my soul.


© KJ Deal 07.15.2006

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

End of one year, beginning of another ... or is it Ending of old habits and beginning new ones?

I'd like to hear your thoughts on this. I've been thinking about the virtues. Should we, (me specifically), fix issues and problems with others that are products of events in the past or should we begin anew and let the virtues reign from now onward?

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

My first altar, created December 26, 2011

My first Altar 
The shells represent (temporarily) water or the well
The dish of soil and crystal represent (temporarily) the tree
And the candles represent fire. I've since added a tall pillar candle along with the tea lights.